Are you I.N.? Join the conversation. Be an Internal Narcissus and let us know how you are loving yourself.

Post your comments. Agree or disagree with what is said. Be a part of this new community of self love.

Dear Inner Circle: I wrote a blog to post on November 25, 2016, but it would not send from the site for it is under construction. I did not fight the block rather went along with it. Which brought me here. ~ Curiously up for air much sooner than expected because on December 9, 2016 I found the final key to turn bringing this last 4 year journey to fruition. Phase I complete and Phase II promising prolific and explicit interactions.

The inner work processed this month caused the last leaf to fall causing full exposure on last negative aspects of self that were arising now and again. To walk into this darkness hands down is the only way through, so I did ~ again and again because we can only see what we are prepared to know, and to know these realities takes precision and time to access. The quests are painstaking, but well rewarded when one can change their behavior to thus forth change the way they interact with their thoughts and life.

More than I could ever explain has changed, and I am most surely not who I once was, so this is why everything else must change too: And so it is. All my work will offload to achieving, so I can real time everything. Gladly, and most excitedly ~ I am ready to jump back in planting both feet deeply into the ground while standing straight up, for the first time in a very long time, and it feels, so very good.

Always, Kellie ~

This is the post meant to be sent but did not.

Dear INner Circle,

My little family and I have been home in Washington state since July 2016, and I have worked every month as assigned in corresponding chakras. July was Root, August was Sacral, September was Solar Plexus, October was Heart, November is still Throat, and next month I begin work in Third Eye. I have always worked with third eye, but never in the way I am being shown now. Silence and meditation will be the strong holds of my December. In certain dharmic spiritual traditions such as Hinduism, the third eye refers to the ajna, or brow, chakra. In Theosophy it is related to the pineal gland. The third eye refers to the gate that leads to inner realms and spaces of higher consciousness. More info at this link https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Third_eye

Where I am is home with my immediate families ~ settled into a lovely little home in the middle of a state park on spiritual land by a powerful river located in a quiet little town adjacent to my favorite mountain. We have cows, horses, chickens, dogs, cats, and parrots. Old ravens, hawks, falcons, eagles, deer, elk, bobcats, bear, rabbits, humming birds, gray doves, blue jays, and many other of God’s beautiful creations. Still taking life very slowly to unwind one step at a time from this very long transpersonal/transformational journey, and guiding others on theirs. Five amazing women have graduated the IN 90 day transformation, and we are all very much stronger and self aware from the work done together, for it is a circle, and we are building a tribe.

Admitting that life has been tough at times while processing old memories and pieces of past that flood my dreams and mind as they do, and when they do, so often without rhyme, reason, or invitation; but all a part of this nine ending year, so a needed part of the process. If at any time I feel anxious trying to speed things along or up ~ I remember to slow down, way down. Bringing my mind back to real-time to experience life inside each breath taken, and always putting God first.

All social media accounts were deactivated last August, so to listen further while setting the stage for the deeper silence needed to get ready for the power of intention in my third eye chakra work. Also because IN is changing because I did, and we are wondering what next steps are. A resurface will happen when it feels right in the new year of January 2017. Until then letting these wings dry off and feet find rest in the newness of serenity in the hearth of my home ~ which is my crazy, beautiful family and truth-north ~ The Pacific Northwest.

Everyday learning to maintain and use the tools hard fought for in the past four years, of deep inner child work. Recovering quicker each time lightening strikes, and will continue too, for this is how we grow. Oh! ~ I learned something today that made me laugh out loud when processed. It is: Anything that I want, I do not need. This sounds like an easy thing, but can be hard when you are just trying it out ~ becoming easier the more you grow into it, so today gave me a special type of peace. Knowing that God has a plan, and I am getting better at holding his truth and letting go of old fears that pop up as they will until they do not. 🙂

Life is so good when we let it ~
God ‘s in His heaven – All ‘s right with the world! http://www.bartleby.com/101/718.html

Love, Kellie J ~ (and Freyja Ann, Amelia Rose, and Xander Xavier)
Author and Transformation Guide at Internal Narcissus

Today is the day….I feel aligned with my now, and will make conscious the letting go and letting be to feel concurrent. Now is this moment that has just passed becoming the second breath underneath the force that connects us to all. Balanced energy, of love and fear, with intent paralleled in foreverness and forwardness that are all I have, and are the energy that gives life; life that is borrowed and returns to the light night after night and day after day.

I read something in my Critical Thinking class today that hit home. It is about false-starts. That they are needed to get where we are ultimately going, so cannot be there without. Not surprising is that we are actually discussing this in week seven blog, in the 90 day transformation work done this week with clients.

The blog, is called Placement. “Lessons learned are stepping stones paving the pathway for our internal growth.” ~ and how we can only get to where we are going from where we are, one step to the next. That we cannot skip a lesson of intended growth, but will get stuck circling, or stagnating.

Learning of this theory or illusion of false starts settled my whole being because every start I have trusted lately, and or followed has changed. As soon as I accept what I thought, then work comes with feelings to process. Magically once through…BAM! Shift. This Chakra work is defiantly keeping me on my toes.

I thought, I am loosing it, but decided to stay very still instead. Being more quiet then ever to listen further to the backdrop of my mind and everything being presented, so to feel the truth. No thinking, just feeling, for the heart knows better, and I trust it more than anything I ever think. Using the shifts as momentum to turn round and then backwards ~ so to find the right door of exit.

No more seeking, for I am in full surrender to this uncomfortable truth, of false starts that have created a place to forever-more be truth: truth in the compliment of acceptance and laying down of lost to truly be free.

“Concurrent is my new black.” And so it is.

Kellie J. Wright ~ Internal Narcissus at Heart ‪#‎heartsaresouls‬
P.S. This is hard, for I have been seeking my entire life…it is the only way through though…I have everthing I need inside me and it will rise and fall as I do. It is time for me to STOP. Huh, I will find this blog to attach in comment below today, for I cannot remember its secrets, but I am feeling I need to read it today. I affirm and accept this alignment. Honoring all that is and ever-shall be. ~ Love yourself like no one is watching are the words I feel. Hmmm…I think I shall. ‪#‎concurrent‬ ‪#‎powerfulme‬ ‪#‎insidejob‬ ‪#‎nowisthetime‬ ‪#‎free‬

Now that she had nothing to lose she was finally free. So she stood up, looked around, and wondered at what all it could be? Sand on the ground, snow in her heart, and beautiful green everywhere ~ made way for assessments in the passing of seasons; two plus years or more it had been.

Licking old wounds, holding heart, and removing the sleep from everything put off. She knew it was time to tap in, root, and decide what she really did want. Oh! and this was a different want, for it was not about people, places, or things. It was a rooting to her body to claim the primal space, for a soul to shine bright and be seen: a magical space of shedding and rebirthing in a place called, Great Mystery.

Every breath taken, every step remembered, looked at, picked up, and turned over ~ was trudged through, for, and not against her, of this she was always sure. Hard knocks to self, spiritual concussions, and deep dark waters all were braved, so to fuel the churning of deeper pools. Wisdoms of this power stored up to give over in a song of redemption that became a tigresses roar. Reuniting self with body, so to never feel alone, again, or evermore.

Circling in the spiral of life, twisting up through its core ~ the upgrade in DNA granted though the sound of one breath connecting us to all. Aye, soft is the belief that in every breath is a sound that works its healing from root to cosmic core. An alignment through Earth Star Chakra to Root that turned out to be, so much more; more than I imagined, and defiantly more than one would expect. Internal Narcissus believes feelings are the Janus in this place where soul doth meet flesh.

Listening further brought through things never revealed, shown, or known of self. These mirrors came with, put in place at the beginning, long ago, maybe even zygote. Lessons stemmed in root, so deep we do not sense the meshing as we start the bumble of slow crawl to first steps, and soar. Too young to know better, too strong to question doubt, oh this place clings till the one day you dare to know more, or find why you are here.

~~~ Big deep breath in, and slow exhale out AND ~ I am still working. I feel home is going to test me in these first three chakras. No, I know this, and am feeling intense third findings of self will be found. Ones etched into each chakra: Root, Sacral, and Solar. Disclosing: I only have ever worked on 4th and 5th chakra, but I digress.

What I did not know, or see coming is that I would not practice Yoga, at all, since I have been home. I feel lonely without it, but I stay the course of my placement. Always following what is presented. This root chakra work, believe it or not, came from watching television (mind you I do not watch TV). Yet, I was invited to watch two television shows with my Aunt. After turning down watching them a few times it became clear to me that I was meant to, so settled IN.

The shows are: Frankie & Gracie and Jane The Virgin. The shows were ruthless. I cried everyday watching all episodes of Frankie & Grace, first. Second, I was uncomfortable in the passions and betrayals of the Novella, Jane The Virgin. However, I allowed myself to go through the gamut of emotions and happenings being presented. Finding different ways to connect and think about my participation in life, self, others, and the world.

About what it means to be human, and in direct relation to relationships. Uncomfortable! Real life stymies me, for I get it, but do not participate in it often enough anymore. Becoming really agitated when people would lie and set one another up on purpose in the Novella. So much to process, so many feelings, and observations, and became an emotional “empathic” mess. Stopping the shows when I could not handle betrayals and misunderstandings…letting emotions wash over me while I railed against them…until finally, yes, FINALLY realizing: I have a hard time feeling what I cannot control. 🙁

These are the questions that came, for me in the first 9 days of root chakra work. They arose from processing what I was not letting myself feel while watching the shows, talking with my aunt, and a download from spirit.

1. Am I conditional (Frankie & Grace)?
2. I think I am still holding on to what I want. Even though I do not know what I want (Frankie & Grace).
3. Its life, you have to experience all of the emotions (my Aunt’s comment while watching me uncomfortably agiatated at the shows).
4. I am the truth inside the lie that was never told. (This is from spirit and I am still working on it).

My answer to question 1. Am I conditional? Yes (not the words I used either), and that realization hurts. Maybe not totally conditional, but down to the minutest strands, yes. I saw where I have created very clear lines, to control the pain of feeling. I would like to believe that this is OK because it protects my sanity, safety, and is a boundary, but on some level I know now this is not right. 🙁

My answer to question 2. I figured out why I think that I am still holding on to what I want. Even though I do not know what I want. Literally. Period. I was hanging onto the ‘want’ down to the last invisible encasings of it. Nothing there except for a clear effervescent bubble. I saw it, so beautiful and light yellow, so it is not that I did not know what I want. The work was to let go of the last lucid holdings of expectations. I thought I had cleared it, but am feeling it right now, yesterday gone, but upon the love over (edit) feel little bits rising in me, so this weekend I will work deeper on root chakra. I hope that makes sense…

This is why I felt that I did not know what I want, but processing and seeing the bubble and the attachment to it keeping me conditional has kept me empty and waiting. Which I believe equals ~ wanting. Yes, they do go hand-in-hand don’t they. Waiting and wanting.

I can honestly say I feel rooted in my physical body, more than ever, and I was wondering if that would be enough. I was told that I have to root myself to the Earth two years ago when I left home. I was suppose to have three energy sessions with my aunt before I left to California. I only had two, and now I know why, or think I do…it would have been insane to root anywhere (I feel) without doing the last two years up until this weekends work.

Well, this is it part I of II Check-IN for last Sunday, July 10, 2016. I will post part II of II Sunday July 17, 2016.

I am sure it is clear now why it is late….there is, so much happening….heavy emotional unwrapping and feeling to be present. Places I usually do not fly…but this is my path, and will not waiver. Please stay with me on this journey, yours too, for we are all one.

Life is the initiation, Kellie J. Wright ~ Internal Narcissus at Heart

Raven Feather

Jul 15, 2016

by

Share on

Today Raven dropped a feather for me. Oh! sacred joyous day, I will remember always date stamp July 15, 2016. I had just finished part I of my Check-IN, and went outside to play with Joy (Grandmother), Freyja Ann, and Hope (her sister). I know this old Raven, too. I have listened to his song and stories for half of my life. He has been active, and always is whenever I come home. I am, humbled and honored with this sacred gift.

The check-in foretells of this magic, and am now, very, sure that I will transfer and work through last layers of root chakra this weekend. Today’s post is check-in 2 Part I of II that was suppose to post last Sunday, July 10, 2016. However, I move according to my internal algorithms not outside. Never pushing past intended lessons of growth. Reasons like this give nod that this is wise.

New blog post, for Root Chakra Check-IN 2 Part I of II is posting this evening at www.internalnarcissus.com ~ Part II of II will post this Sunday.

Blessings for a divine day in your frequency of choice. and please try to honor all and others. Remembering that just because someone does not understand you does not mean they do not like or hate you, for we all start and stop in different places, and peace comes from love balanced in ones light and dark…

Internal Narcissus believes it is is the master plan ~ believing there is so much more going on here on Earth than we can ever comprehend at once, so it is imperative that we come together. Please be kind to one another, for we are all so precious and deserving of real happiness in the now.

Life is the initiation, Kellie J. Wright ~ Internal Narcissus
#raven #medicine #mentalhealth #transcendence #transformation #steppinstones #heartsaresouls #weareallone #love #fear #keystones #feathers #inflight
PS When I went to look at Raven online, for a sign. I found this: http://www.indigenouspeople.net/raven1.htm

I take what some people call “chances” in life. Never play it safe, and always work from the heart. Trying to stay IN my lane and be present in all of my moments. Admittedly, this is harder sometimes than others, for I am a human trying. A work in progress.

Most recently, working with root chakra: I see a wall built around this knowledge, around my belief drawn from the very depths of my core of how powerful we all are, and the truth that we affect each other and self daily with and without knowledge of this. I believe this knowledge had kept me circling and made me more of a recluse than a participant in my life lately.

Knowing this in the now helped me pull a tool earned from prior work to initiate a change. The ability to make a choice about my perception and make changes to its conclusions. We talk about this in Internal Narcissus A Spiritual Transformation: that We can unlearn and relearn all we have, but are no better than the conclusion we found ourselves in until we use these skills in relation and participation with others.

It truly does take a village. Nothing and no one is a mistake. Right now I want to thank Mary DeRoche (Past IN Radio Special guest) and her sister Christina who followed a connection in their heart sending an email about a spiritual radio show host looking for a co-host.

I have not discussed the co-hosting, but did send him my one-sheet and booked my first Radio Show appearance in over a year! Big smile. Also, in the middle of booking two more shows.

Today, I reached IN and then back out to be who I came to be. Everything in life is a choice. We chose. I chose you, and all entities here on Earth to share my love and light. We can and we will overcome fear. And so it is. Excited is a good word to describe the way I feel about talking about Internal Narcissus e-book and my guided 90 day transformation’s. | The show is recorded on August 2, 2016 at 7PM ~ Pyramid One Radio! I will send out more information on the show and where to find it very soon.

Love Life, Kellie J. Wright

Where You Are

Jul 6, 2016

by

Share on

Where are you sitting and what are you thinking? Are you in the moment or somewhere else? Wherever you are please be there to start paving the where you want to be on your road less traveled.

Make a commitment to have what you are doing (right now to see it through). Create an exact dedication acknowledging its fruition. One that you can easily remember and bring to life in moments of doubt or alone time, for this is how we start to build the dream inside of us.

The one we came from, and can know once we start to feel its truth resonating from deep within. ~ Now pull a breath from the depths of your heartstrings to play your signature song. Then exhale slowly to feel its goodness in a residing comfort to keep you strong.

You know this place, you feel your peace, and you are the hope that became freedom before you decided you could not. This is your life beautiful sisters and brothers, your dream, so make it the one you know. ~ You do know the way.

Love Life, Kellie J. Wright ~ Internal Narcissus
P.S. Take a chance to change the way you feel about yourself, one thought at a time. It is a journey of self love and acceptance of self that is the most inspiring way to be in your world (our world). I pray for all to hear the call of truth that lives within. And so it is. Reach out to me for a consultation to start today! I am so excited to be working with you!

Grounding Your Energy Into Your Root Chakra

Your physical body is your first temple, the foundation for mental and physical health.

When you are ungrounded in your physical body, you can feel unstable in your life. You can lose your center, fly off the handle, daydream too much, feel like you are not focused or ‘all here’ in your daily work. When you bring your focus into your body, you find yourself feeling more secure in all aspects of your life. Grounding practices focus energy in the here and now. There are many simple ways to ground your energy including:

1. eating foods directly from the earth (unprocessed)
2. exercise
3. physical touch
4. through creating a nurturing home space for yourself
5. through following a daily schedule
6. creating healthy routines

This information is exactly what I need to connect to my outside world. I have been feeling a deep call to honor all 6 of these items, for it is imperative going forward to build this daily practice needed to co-create a life worth having and sharing with others. This is part I affirmation, for my root chakra work July 2016.

Adding ~ that my idea of how to process root chakra has already changed. My intended plan of action (to use same methods as Earth Star Chakra) already has morphed into something else entirely. It is OK though. I have gotten used to fast changes lately, and have adjusted accordingly to follow signs. I am committed to not missing a step and learning rapidly. Trust me in that this does feel odd, and I do feel strangely like a fish out of water.

However ~ I am taking solace in the deep gasping of air before every breath inhaled and needed to dive deeper below this illusion of self. This is done by listening further to submerge physical and mental body into what I feel and know are my truths. Also in that I cannot deny the work that has been given to find and process, in the meaning of these flowing thoughts that came to me in last few days:

1. Am I conditional?
2. I think I am still holding on to what I want. Even though I do not know what I want.
3. Its life, you have to experience all of the emotions.
4. I am the truth inside the lie that was never told. (WTF?) (Have I been given a riddle, if so it is the first one?)

I cannot explain any of this yet ~ oh, but I will. Excited and thankful that there are 31 days in July, for all days will be needed to find these vaults of stored emotions and truth (gulp).

Stay with me on my journey, yours too, for we are all one.

Love, Kellie J. Wright ~ Internal Narcissus at Heart

Earth Star Chakra. Oh my goodness what do I say? When I set off to work I always find a little piece of information to start thinking and pondering on within. I then apply my own knowledge to use with my sacred medicine inside of me to heal. Searching, for clues, and opening up to hear divine consciousness speak to me. To hear God and to connect to all the signs that are all around me.

Yoga Story was insatiably one of the most important parts of the healing in this transpersonal chakra work. Each practice dedicated to Earth Star Chakra, first. Then I used my scrimshaw to connect to Mother Earth, and a bracelet made of stones and crystals, for Gaia through all meditation chakra works.

The bracelet is a Chinese bracelet that I bought, so long ago ~ that I could not believe I found it in my things. God is good and Mother Earth is, too. Here are the wisdoms learned in June 2016 ~ especially the first nine days of this healing work done in Earth Star Chakra:

This is what I first read and connected to for my work this month:

“The Earth Star Chakra holds a connection to the living spirit of Mother Earth, also known as Gaia and her multidimensional nature. We are electromagnetically connected to the center of Mother Earth. As human beings, we can only be as beautiful and glorious as the Great Mother whose womb we are all still in. The entire planet is covered by grids of energy and light that connect the people, places and sacred structures together in miraculous ways.” http://chakrahealingmovement.com/theearthstarchakra/

I began June 1st: I only drank water and had a few small bites of Noosa yogurt each morning before yoga. I had coffee as a treat when I got home. Then some fruit with the rest of the Noosa. I washed and cleaned the fruit slow and with intention. I would not rush the process to make coffee either. I made time for my hunger, and my work to honor all as I went about my new morning routine. Each yoga practice was dedicated to my Earth Star Chakra, to life, and Mother Earth (other things here that are for my knowledge and personal sacred works).

At the very beginning this felt odd, though, because every time I tried to honor her (Mother Earth). Give all my homage to her for the practice I felt guilty. A pit in my stomach appeared. I could never say or give the whole offering to her without bringing creator into it too. At first it didn’t bother me too much just a slight knowing in my solar plexus. I would just adjust the dedication, and then was free to flow with thoughts found through images, words to work on, and the instructors intentions for the hour. Things started to happen day one…

I knew immediately this work would include my mother, too. So when I brought her in it was then shown to bring all of my earth mothers, grandmothers, and female ancestors in to honor as well. Also calling on Archangel Sandalphon, to bring my prayers directly to creator…I have never felt they did not go straight there, but he is this chakras angel and I was taking no chances!

Eventually realizing that I was working with my birth mother AND my father. This is where it gets a little deeper. Stay with me…

I couldn’t understand why I couldn’t commit a single practice to just Mother Earth, and feel free to honor her and the bounty of Earth which we are a part of. It was an hour, so why could I not just be with her? I could not do it without feeling overwhelming guilty, and had to bring creator into the dedication, too, every time. Finally, knowing, this is a block, my block, what is this block?!

Why was I feeling guilty and could not leave father out of it? It was just an hour of a yoga practice to heal and center Earth Star Chakra..then it finally happened the softening of mind ~ going back in time to realize that father had blocked mother from me…sadness…

I will leave the tale of my mother and father’s divorce, or the part that I think I know out of this. What I do feel is that it was a painful thing that they both went through, and I being the oldest child had a huge block. My father had blocked me for my mother. He was not happy that she left him, so he kept my sister and I. My mother would visit, I remember this. I do believe this is where I created my first block against mother unbeknownst to me. My whole life I’ve never been able to truly connect to my mother. Don’t get me wrong, I love my mother, dearly, but we just never deeply connected.

Internal Narcissus believes that I installed a belief that I had to choose between my mother and father whenever they were around because I did not want to hurt their feelings. I believe that father blocked me from mother because he was in pain and that mother blocked us because she could do nothing else and was in pain. She had to submit. I believe we all did, and that we did the best we could at the time with the tools that each of us had.

I was baffled and freed in this work, and I went in deep to meet us all in the memory of mind. As I silently cried in yoga meditation ~ I released the pain and cleared the blocks I had imagined and put in place. I forgave my father and I forgave my mother, and I forgave me.

I forgave my father for being hurt and blocking my mother from me. I forgave my mother for not being strong enough to stand up against my father. And I forgave me as a little girl, for not understanding how to love both at the same time without hurting their feelings.

(Tears) (pain) (sorrow) ~ Oh what a tangled web we weave…

The beauty in this traffic section of my life is the three instances where I was able to connect and actually see myself, and see myself with my mom. I have never been able to connect to early memories of me, or me with her. In this work connecting through mind, body, breath, and yoga I was availed my biggest gifts so far in this journey:

I saw me as a little baby. I was in the hospital nursery. Newborn. I could feel myself in the little body. I could feel my hands move and my mouth sucking and cooing. I could see outward at my mom.

A second time I was playing with me as a baby. Taking my little hands and arms pushing them together then apart saying a-boo.

Then the third time I saw my mother playing with me, and doing the same thing with my little arms. I was so touched and honored to be able to be taken back to those memories. To do this work is thankless, it is selfless, and selfish at times. Yet, I am so thankful for the commitment to know self and free these unknown blocks to be free in the now.

No longer trying to protect them and harming myself and others unknowingly in the process. Removing the blocks that my father needed my allegiance to shield him from his pain against my mother. And being able to see my mother loving me when I was a baby are all gifts that took me 3 1/2 years to get too. All spirit led ~ completely 100% indivisible. I love them both and hold no fear or anger. Our lives are our perceptions to honor or decline. We decide.

I thought I was done on day 9 with the work, but just recently I worked with Earth Star Chakra again. Thinking I was fine, but having some blocks, so knew to look inward. Finally going outside to look at the sky and be in the “chair of real.”

I was looking and feeling all around calling to God and on my sanity to help me through the pain and resistance that I was feeling. Then it hit me, and I knew it was time to clear any past pain and unintentional harm done through vanity, pride, or ego from a child forward being stored in my Earth Star Transpersonal Chakra.

I fell to my knees and cried full of unabashed shame knowing I had hurt people, for we all have, and I begged for forgiveness and to please be released. To be washed cleaned with my tears and bare knees digging into cement. Thankfully, it was given, I knew, when the wind came up and whipped around me, so fiercely in circles. God had heard and released my sins, Mother Earth had heard me and forgiven me for hurting her children. Oh my this work is something powerful, and that had to be done. I feel blessed to have the strength to keep following signs to get to the heart of self to free me.

I can honestly say I’ve never been more connected humanly in my life. I have always said I could not connect to my female side. Always connecting more to my masculine side. And I knew a year ago that I would be working on connecting and balancing the two, and by gosh, I finally have. Shocked and thrilled to say the least, and full on in the knowing that there can be no balance within the human body or soul if we are not balanced in mother and father. That means birth mother and father, too. We are both. We do not exist without mother and father, and this definitely means Creator and Mother Earth. Since the work with my mom and dad and clearing those blocks I have had not problem honoring either or both. I feel so balanced too.

Part of connecting to Earthstar chakra is connecting to Mother Earth. Every bounty on this earth comes from her. Everything we eat and the air we breath. We cannot do one thing without planet Earth. It is time that we start to recognize this to clear pain and honor her as we honor father. Tend her and take care of her for future generations. Through this work I could not help to think…what did they do to mother? Where is she? Why do we only talk about father?

Internal Narcissus knows now that if we do not connect to both mother and father then we are not connecting all. We have to fix this or everything that we have done to get us to this point may parish. We truly are all one. We are half male and half female. It takes both species to make one. Think on it….

In this time during June I have learned to honor the practice of creation. Honoring God and Mother Earth. We simply do not exist without both. I thank them, for life and the gift of finally being connected in real time to both and how that is everything. I take time to create beautiful meals made with love. Honoring even the the knife that it cutting my fruit and vegetables (the people who made it or dug the minerals to make it). Mostly I thank them for being an awake, alive, human who gets to enjoy all of it.

Walking my mind out of darkness again through transpersonal chakra clearing was tough work. I could never in my wildest dreams thought to find these blocks, but hard work and belief did. All the vanity and pride that I used or held against another that I didn’t know either, wow! Transpersonal is the self. Transpersonal Chakra is for real.

Next month is the Root Chakra, and with the freedoms earned have new next steps. I AM going home to Washington state for the month of July to work on Root Chakra to be where I was born and grew, so it makes complete sense.

The biggest gift of all that happened this June is that I learned in this final work in being spirit led ~ is that I am the led. I am my spirit. I make my decisions and my choices, and I am free to change them, too. Stay with me on my journey, for sure to continue and surprise the heck out of me. Hopefully inspire something in you, too.

I will talk more about Root Chakra next Sunday.

Love Life, Kellie J. Wright ~ Internal Narcissus

I grow stronger every day. As I build and grow the business as a design, for my life in real time by faith with Creator and Mother. I cannot explain the changes inside of me that has come, so fast, faster than ever. I know that the last three weeks of committed daily hot yoga while dedicating each practice to the work with, Earth Star Chakra, Mother Earth, Gaia, Creator, and Earth Mothers and Fathers has guided it all. I feel completely at one with both Creator and Mother Earth, and this has never been so before.

This is different than anything I have ever felt. I see and am given more than ever before in signs and downloads coming all day and through the night. I am forced to wake up to record them into my phone, and am convinced it will become a book that I was given a name at the very beginning of this journey.

Life is way high right now, and is still a little too noisy while getting ready to move and processing the whole next steps given in my journey. I see now why I needed to stay grounded here in Arkansas, for I needed to be grounded to do this work in transpersonal chakra. Wow is putting it lightly. Intense is right on, and needed, for me to do anything required in the work going forward to be love and assist as a guide for personal healing. This is a deeply grounded journey in interpersonal work with perception, self, and family.

I can honestly say (again) that I was blind and now can see. Baby steps are the only ones that could have been taken to pave the road to the here and right now. The ones needed to find the little doors behind the big doors of dark that lead straight to the heart of thy foundation. The keys that connect us to, all. The whole system is slowly coming to me in shifts that I am dutifully speaking into my phone. Held rapt in the solidification, finally, of ~ I am creating every second. I/we are creating our lives in each breath taken in each thought and through grace. Think about it…

I feel honored to have finally stepped into my calling and am working with Beautiful people, who just like me needed a little extra push to find the strength inside them to challenge all. The number one reason being our love for God, our families, and the desire to live a full life free from fear, drama, and stigma. Awake in real time is real life (As my friend, Jan Edwards, so correctly stated the other day). Clearing past to be present in the now is wonderful, and all of this just made me smile, so big!

Creator is waking us up, and I have three plus years of knowledge on how to fight the enemy called fear, pride, and ego. In this is an invitation to dive IN, for a 90 day transformations with me. Message me, for a consultation as to what it is exactly, and how it works ~ to see if it feels right for you.

I feel sure that a guide is needed because I tried to do this on my own, for years. I would sit alone in isolation trying to figure things out for myself, but once I committed to the 90 day transformation and had an accountability partner my world changed. It is not a joke that when two or more are in his presence…please think about it.

Internal Narcissus is going to meditate, for a proper check-in on Earth Star Chakra in regards to all of the amazing work done in yoga, crystals, and meditation work thus far, and will post a proper download next week as a summation to all of the works done in June. Intricate and powerful awakenings happened, and I will never be the same, and am so thankful, for I feel more connected and alive! I am balanced in mother and father (more to come).

Love Life, Kellie J. Wright ~ Internal Narcissus at Heart

Today is Sunday Check-IN, for the next steps in my spiritual journey working on the Earth Star Chakra. I still have not named this directive, and may just title the check-in’s by date and chakra per month. This shift came on so fast, and I do not feel it is a transformation because it is an 8 month commitment, but it is shift work. Maybe it is an internal shift? I will let it come if it does, but for now I am just feeling like it is a sinking in and letting of.

My intuition says this is, for Balance. Hence the hot yoga coupled with chakra and crystal work. It is work to stay balanced through an hour of hot yoga working in mind, body, and pose while working directly with spirit. My usual medium is water and deep meditative dream work. Though I am still using it at home to process signs, and revelations found in class. It is not an accident that I am suppose to use yoga’s mind, body, and connection to breathe, for my chakra-crystal healing.

This weeks work was a deep giving over and complete surrender atoning memories stored in my Earth Star Chakra center. I did not know that could happen, but it is transpersonal, so that memories are stored there is not too much of a surprise. The work was deeply personal and I am choosing to keep it to myself as I go over it and process it this week. I was going to share a video blog, but it got cancelled twice in the making, so am taking it as a sign to be still. We do not grow ahead at IN.

I am finding my way through this new journey one minute at at time by staying in the day, moment, and its intended month. Each chakra is so different that I can only guess the work will be too. This is why I relinquish control, or thinking that I know what is best for me in this work, for when I surrender and open my heart to spirit. I always am given what I need, and this week took me places I never would have found on my own otherwise…

My first 90 day transformation was to become balanced in mind body and soul to find true love. In the end processing that God is my happily ever after and first love.

My second 90 day transformation started as one thing and quickly turned into working on throat and heart chakra. This was to learn to find and speak my truth then validating my worth.

My third 90 day transformation started as one thing and quickly changed into working on clearing cellular memory blocks in father and twin flame relationship work. Then it continued afterwards turning into mother relationship work. And continued on tirelessly once in Arkansas. It was dark and onerous at times, but I owned it ~ knowing I had too, it is my journey and my mind I was fighting to center, so nothing would stop me.

And here we are working again, no rest, LOL. And so many things have happened this week shocking me clean with the energy work processed in my yoga sessions that I cannot even fathom to try to explain it all to you, so will not right now. Believing what should be revealed will, as it can , and when it comes.

This journey of awakening that I grow out loud to inspire others IN never ceases to amaze me. Earth Star Chakra that I did not know much about before 12 days ago literally blew my mind. Here is some information that I found on Earth Star Chakra, online, before I started this new journey June 1, 2016:

“If you are familiar with your chakra system, you will know that there are usually only 7 chakras that are focused on and they all reside within the body. However, there are additional transpersonal chakras that exist within the auric field of the body and within the earth. These transpersonal chakras are awakened as we transition from the 3rd dimensional to 5th dimensional reality. The Earth Star Chakra is located about 11-12 inches below your feet.”

This week was resoundingly about trusting the process (my process and my faith). Listening further by creating space to be very still. And the blessing of re-learning yoga at Yoga Story with their amazing group of healing instructors. I know every little thing I did and steps followed had to happen as they did (exactly) for any of what transpired to transpire, so am grateful and honored, for my friends, family, and now instructors who are working with me, and allowing the grace for me to do what I do in: accepting that I never question what I am given by spirit, follow what I hear blindly with eyes wide open and closed, as I trust obsessively in the divine flow of all.

I will not post anything on the work processed and cleared this past week through my yoga practice. It is still new, deeply personal, and beautiful. I am choosing to hold it as close as a new born baby to protect, love-on, and honor its call to be known and then for me to let lovingly go.

Eternally, Kellie J. Wright ~ Internal Narcissus at Heart