Dear Inner Cirle,
This is a personal testimony from an amazing woman, and graduate of an IN 90 Day Spiritual Transformation. I am honored to have worked with her, and feel blessed for her wonderful thank you ~ in a voice to help illuminate the time, effort, work, and results of this deeply personal process…
My 90 day IN Experience
We are all storytellers. We tell ourselves stories every day. We believe these stories so much, they become our life and identity.
Kellie and her spirit inspired book “Internal Narcissus: A spiritual Transformation” helped me hold a mirror to my life experiences and see the stories which influence my life. It is interesting because these stories are based on our comprehension of the world around us, filtered with our own kaleidoscope of understanding.
Much of this understanding is solidified before we reach adulthood. Kellie helped me realize we make life decisions with understandings forged at tender and undeveloped ages.
Kellie curated a 13-week experience to explore the intent behind these stories. She helped question the boundaries and triggers that make up my life. Kellie’s philosophy revolves around being in “real-time”, living with intention, and dealing with fear so one can speak and live ones truth. I was blessed to participate in her course last fall.
The process was insightful, yet uncomfortable at times. Self-observation is eerie. I do not like feeling vulnerable. Kellie encouraged me to regard myself as a friend and defend myself like I would others.
The logistics of the 90 days were important to me. I have a career, a husband, endless laundry and cooking, a full social calendar filled with family and friends, so I could not checkout of life and spend 90 days meditating in a cave. I “met” with Kellie over the telephone twice a week.
The first session was at the beginning of the week to review the week’s topic. The rest of the week was living with the material. I journaled, meditated, re-read the chapter in the book, generally processing the material. At the end of the week, we met for the second session to clarify and review my observations. We used Evernote to communicate with general check-ins and record thoughts/communication. It was both intense and fun.
There were layers of growth during my time with Kellie. I found I grew the most when I was not hiding behind bad habits or defenses. Kellie was able to see these patterns and call me out when my defenses started to assert themselves. Open-mindedness was imperative to this process.
During my journey, an amazing number of synchronicities occurred during this transformation period. Reoccurring themes of change, revelation, and vivid, crazy dreams furthered the process. Quotes found their way to me that confirmed that week’s topic. Friends and acquaintances would bring up topics related to the work. My meditations were transcendent. These were confirmations of a mystical nature.
I am a creative person, but I do have the imagination to create these experiences. The phrase “I can’t make this up” was used often during my sessions with Kellie. The Universe was talking and I was listening. Leonardo da Vinci was correct when he said, “Learn how to see. Realize that everything connects to everything else.”
The insights during my personal journey were hard won and resonant frequently. While everyone’s journey will be different, we are all seekers of a bigger and higher truth.
With Kellie, you will learn to see the falsehoods that keep you in specific pattern of behavior. The lessons I learned have become mantras of understanding I apply to life. They are keys to further my awakening journey. I found this transformation process was about showing up and doing the work. It was about showing up to live life.
The lasting effects of this time with Kellie include an innate calmness, a sense of self, and a strong sense of ownership over my life. I am still learning and growing; I am a work in progress. I am excited for you to have your journey. We are creating our lives with these stories we tell ourselves – what is your story?
BCM; Adapted from originally published article “What a 90 day Spiritual Transformation Taught Me”, 2017 01 11